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    你在時光剪影深處

    2017-08-08 09:13 | 文/南梔皎兮、 | 23802次閱讀 | 相關文章

    多年以后,方茗重新回到了廈門。

    恰逢南風天,鼓浪嶼依然繁華,像個文青,一花一木,一瓦一礫,是那么的隨意,又是那么的刻意,譜寫著廈門的詩意氣息。據說這片浪漫溫暖的海島已申遺成功。

    他們最終還是分手了......

    有人說,遠方的情侶到廈門旅游一定會分手。

    方茗自小向往大海,向往大海的激情澎湃,向往大海的無邊無際,向往海上暈紅的日出日落,夢想著有一天能在海邊看到揚帆歸來的水手里有父親的身影......所以她報了廈門的大學,與此同時,她背叛了當初的承諾,就連畢業旅游都沒有兌現。

    而他,白胤川,卻從來沒有對愛失去信任,那么執著,那么堅定。到大二,他從昆明飛到廈門看她三次,每過來看她一次都要花他半個學期的零花錢。他寧可每天到飯店兼職,也要攢夠去廈門的機票費;寧可每頓吃白菜豆腐喝免費湯,也要攢夠請她吃一頓大餐的糧票;他寧可推掉所有朋友的聚餐,也要攢夠為她準備一件像樣的生日禮物。在他眼里,方茗就是一切。

    她笑靨如花,淺淺的梨渦,杏眼明眸,可以溫順得像只小羔羊,也可以活潑得像只小瘋兔,有時候還可以狡猾得像只小野貓。可她內心很敏感,也很孤寂,總是太看中感情,特別在意別人對自己的看法,總因為別人脫口而出的閑言碎語煩惱很多天,總因為別人的忽視而焦慮。漸漸地,她學會了察言觀色,卻學不會伶牙俐齒;看懂了世界的冷暖清白,卻捱不透處世之道;含著刻在骨子里頭的自尊心,卻不得不為自己修煉一副精致的皮囊。什么時候開始,微笑與贊許必須形成通體透明的保護色。而誰都沒有教會她這一切......

    猶記得高一那年的那一天,晨光熹微,朝霞旖旎。一米晨曦灑在安娜山上,一群白鴿盤旋在迎風飄揚的紅旗旁,然后又飛走。就像一個個夢想聚集于此,然后逐步隨風飛向遠方。他們都很努力,都很優秀。所以聚集在最高學府的重點班,學習氛圍很濃厚。班里52個女孩,圍著10個嬌羞的男孩,胤川就是其中一個。他總穿著淺色系的襯衫,搭黑色九分褲,長得很干凈的男孩。他坐在她后面,一坐就是三年。她少言寡笑,而他卻是個話嘮,開朗的笑容很治愈。漸漸地,他走進了她的內心世界,替他排解焦慮,懂她呵護她,在她最痛苦的時候緊緊守在她的身邊。在她被所有人誤會的時候,他寧愿跟所有人作對,守住她破碎的心。每天關注她的面部表情,或開心,或苦悶,或煩惱。他會每晚在凌晨一點半跟她說,該睡了。每天清晨,她桌子上總有一瓶牛奶,每天變換不同的口味。每個星期六晚上,他們都會到外面吃點心。終于在他們高三的時候,他表白了,她手足無措,這一切來得太突然,還是答應了,因為他很害怕失去一個懂她疼她愛他的人,那年她17歲。

    高中是青春最充實的時光,風華正茂,一個個含苞待放的理想,經歷狂風暴雨的洗禮,也經歷祥云彩虹的渲染。一句句鏗鏘有力的宣誓詞,響徹逸夫樓,直沖云霄。有汗水,有歡笑。

    有真情,有矛盾。有暗戀,有曖昧。后知后覺,班里看起來沉默寡言的書呆子也會狂野,瘋瘋癲癲的屌絲也會因為離別而哭泣,每天在后排沉溺在小說與游戲的學渣也可以一步登天上211。高中生活盡管枯燥乏味,卻不忍過早失去。看著墻上的倒計時,越發單薄,越發感傷。終于還是畢業了,她在高考時中暑,發揮失常,斷絕所有人的聯系,包括他。

    然而,他還停留在原地......

    有人說,異地的情侶一定會分手。

    她去了沿海,他們還是一如既往的聯系,只是他很早就跟她說晚安,在她剛從圖書館學習回來沒多久。他還是一如既往的關心她,只是他的關心卻變成了說教,少了一絲寵溺。她不再想把自己的悲傷和煩惱再強加在千里之外的人身上,因為這樣也得不到擁抱反而給她增加負擔。他們聽不到彼此的笑音,感受不到彼此的溫度。漸漸地,關心變成了監視,呵護變成了占有。他容不得她與異性來往,甚至拍照時站在異性旁邊,掛斷電話就是旁邊有異性。他們的話題變得越來越少,她不再像以前那樣無所顧忌的傾訴。兩個人,兩座城,他在高原上感受不到海風的咸度,她在沿海感受不到那頭的寒冬。終于這一切使他們的愛情開始變質,她開始追尋自由。

    有人說,三觀不同的情侶都會分手.......

    方茗自小是個害羞內斂且好面子的姑娘,連鄰居家都不好意思去拜訪,但在高三的清明假期,胤川自作主張幫她買了回家的車票,并勉強她一同回家,在到他家的兩天方茗每分每秒都是煎熬,站著也不對坐著也不合適,說的每句話都要再三考慮,周圍人都投來異樣的目光。而且這事讓其他同學知道了,并且議論不休,方茗心里真是有苦說不出。處女座的方茗十分的保守,始終覺得愛情尤其是應該保持純潔度,但這在胤川眼中是跟不上時代步伐的表現。方茗是一個吃貨,在第三次他提出要到廈門來開始,方茗做了很久的美食攻略,都是當地特色,哪想到胤川吃一個說一句不好吃,方茗很苦惱,兩個人的胃口實在走不到一塊。方茗喜歡帶他去電影院,但胤川覺得網上很快就會有免費流暢版了,沒必要花那么多金錢。方茗向往大繁華的大城市生活,能夠時常到娛樂與健身場所放松,能夠接觸各種各樣的人,能夠緊緊跟隨時代的發展步伐,而胤川卻覺得她變得世故了.......這一切,都讓方茗進入深思,并且決定提出分手。

    有人說,初戀一定走不到最后......

    方茗想了很久,分手或許對雙方來說都是解脫。她終于明白自己對胤川根本不是愛,從頭到尾都是因為感動,因為她不想失去這個對她無微不至的男孩。他真誠,對愛執著,最重要的是他懂她的心,再加上方茗的不懂拒絕,最終才走到了一起。在一起之后,他確實也是一個寵票狂魔,連續飛到廈門看她三次,陪她旅行,耐心幫她拍照,陪她鬧陪她笑。她說肚子餓了,幾分鐘外賣員就打過來了;她說想念家鄉的味道,順豐快遞兩天之內找上門;她說在逛街,紅包就立刻彈出微信窗口。這是多少萬千少女心中的理想型,包括方茗,可是她還是放棄了。他們彼此都是初戀,都很懵懂,也許這就是青春吧,盡管方茗明白自己有一天會很想念一個叫白胤川的男孩。

    在時光剪影里,他來過,留下一道彩虹,那樣絢爛,那樣純真。他走了,帶走了她的淚珠,帶走了她的青春。

    評論

    • 風兒:愛情很微妙,初戀般的純情,異地的戀愛,讓我想到了我自己,何曾不是這樣的十八歲讓我迷戀上了郭鵬亮,大學的異地,絕情的分手,可是他始終在我的心內有一席地位,每每回憶,提到他的時候都是我的痛,時光的剪影能不能把他帶走,帶走曾經給的傷。

      贊(0)回復2017-08-28
    • 馳騁韜略:您好,我是《微文美刊》編輯,您的詩歌非常好,《微文美刊》微刊和紙刊出版特向您征稿,邀請您參加,如有意向,請關注微信公眾號“微文美刊”(wwmk66),或加編輯微信dxh688(注明散文吧)

      贊(0)回復2017-10-22

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